By Deno Gellepes 

In a world wildly oversaturated with subscription-based television, microbreweries and the constant recycling of age-old concepts, steering our brains through the endless options and toward a decision – on anything – can be about as overwhelming as trying to comprehend an Alan Watts lecture. 

During the recent rain storms, I had a friend visiting from out of town, and with Golden Gate Park plans now literally washed away, it was up to me to decide on Plan B. When my friend told me he was up for “beers, burgers/brats and sports in your neighborhood!” I finally had an easy decision. Sometimes the rain can work in mysterious ways. 

So, it is my pleasure to introduce you to Steins, a German sports bar at 731 Clement St. Steins specializes in German beers, sausages and European soccer (among all of our favorite stateside sports). It offers 12 beers on tap with most coming from Germany and other European countries, in addition to some local and traditional domestic favorites. It also has a pleasant wine selection featuring numerous German options and standard non-alcoholic fare, but no liquor. 

Along with a spacious bar top, the layout of Steins is very European in that it has open table seating for large groups to mingle with smaller parties all while watching sports from the multitude of televisions spouting live games and analysis from overhead. I’ve seen the place pack up for big European soccer matches and it’s always a lively place to be if you like that type of atmosphere. 

Another thing – and this is an important one – is that Steins might specialize in beer and sausages, but you smell the sausages more than you do the beer, and that’s a tribute to the cleanliness that the staff adheres to. Too often, places that sell so much beer, have the occupational hazard of reeking like stale and spilled beer, but not here! 

On the walls and ceilings hangs a wide assortment of European soccer clubs’ and individual countries’ national flags. Every time I enter or even walk by Steins, I always get the feeling that it’s a World Cup year, and that’s a thrilling vibe. There’s also wall space above the bar dedicated to some seriously cool vintage MLB and NFL team pennants and a randomly placed shot of San Francisco’s own, Joe DiMaggio, to greet you near the entrance. 

As my friend and I approached the front door of Steins, we stepped out of the way as a large group of jersey-clad soccer fans filed out after what looked and sounded like an unfortunate loss for their team. What was their loss ended up being our gain as we could now easily saddle up to the empty bar, save for a few stragglers who still wanted to drown out their sorrow.
We were greeted quickly and ordered two half-liters of the Hacker-Pschor Gold Lagers to sip while we decided on food. The beers were crisp and light which was perfectly suited to accompany our lunch and good conversation ahead. 

The half-liter beers are large enough to let you know you don’t need a full liter in one sitting. The beer can get warm and it’s just a lot of liquid upfront, for me anyway. In our case, we wanted to try a couple of different beers as well, so moving to the size below for the simple price of $5 made the most sense. It’s great that they allow the flexibility for three different sizes, depending on how you’re feeling. Hence the name Steins. 

Next up was a Benediktiner Festbier that had a golden amber color and strong malty flavor. It was a gorgeous beer and tasted like it looked, but we both agreed that with lunch on the agenda, the Festbier would be too malt-heavy and that a switch back to a lager would be best to avoid a complete body shut-down and loss of appetite. Instinctively, we looked at each other the way only guys nearing 40 can do, both feeling the need to defend our reasoning: 

“Man, I used to be able to drink these beers, regardless of alcohol content, size, whatever, all day long and never get full! My body just gets filled up faster now.” 

“I hear you, man. We used to do flights of these beers, then a pitcher, and never felt a thing!” 

But time waits for no one, and after a silent pause that was essentially us accepting our new reality, we ordered the small lagers and moved on to lunch. 

There was very little deliberation on food which, with that would make it three easy decisions in a row, I then worried we’d get hit by a car on our way out the door later (Natures way of evening the score, I suppose.). We went right for their specialty and ordered the Smoked Bratwurst plate that comes with fries and house-made sauerkraut. We also added a classic burger and fries combo to split because, on previous trips to Steins, I’d had all of their sausage plates, and while all are fantastic, I’d never tried their burger. 

As always, the food was fantastic and abundant. My friend raved about the flavor and texture of the sausage along with the great portions for the price, and sauerkraut that wasn’t overly tangy. The burger surprised us both as we expected it just to be a shoulder shrug since they specialize in sausages, but it was a legit burger and I’d get it again! 

I’m not too picky with bar food, but nothing is more frustrating than an over-priced burger that comes with an ill-fitting bun and too much this, or that, and it just becomes a sloppy mess. This was not one of those, but rather, a perfectly crafted burger and a pleasant surprise to go along with the rest of their great menu. 

Steins also runs enticing weekly specials via their Instagram feed. Like a lot of bars and restaurants, they run these specials on traditionally slower days to try and attract more clientele. Over the last few Mondays, their Instagram has promoted a NY Steak night, Tri-Tip, homemade beef chili, and even goulash specials all for around $25-35 with a beer included! It had me reevaluating my Monday night routine and Steins has their marketing department to thank. 

While the Richmond District touts some of the City’s most diverse food and beverage, you don’t run into many German-inspired places, so Steins corners the market in that regard and it’s great to have them as a go-to in the neighborhood since 2011. I’ve been going to Steins since they opened and I’ve seen huge soccer crowds, casual Warriors crews, NFL playoffs and even kids having birthday parties. It’s the epitome of a neighborhood gem, and although the experience of a Lou’s sandwich and beers in Golden Gate Park is unparalleled, I’m psyched I got to take my buddy to Steins. 

Finding the perfect words to capture the simple joy of being sheltered from the rain, at the bar top, and in the warmth of good company with the clinking of giant beer glasses ringing out, can be elusive. It’s a Saturday in February now and the holiday chaos has faded into a distant memory, work demands can wait their turn, and in this space, time seems to stand still. However, I believe Alan Watts sums it up best: “The sound of the rain needs no translation.” 

Steins is located at 731 Clement St. Learn more at its Yelp page.

Deno Gellepes is a 13-year San Franciscan originally hailing from Chico, CA. He’s a sales professional at a leading tech company and has a passion for music, writing and sports, especially as they pertain to the history of San Francisco. He spends weekdays sounding like Rick Steves and weekends like Mick Jagger. He can be reached at denogellwriting@gmail.com.